*
At least she’s still got her smart Hermes jacket and a sensible navy skirt.
*
Last night I had a long dream where I was living in my dream house, a scattering of modernist cubes on a rolling landscape of grass on a cliff overlooking the sea, with a dark thicket of woods behind and miles of emptiness and silence.
I drank coffee on the deck and listened to the waves and the rising birdsong as the sun came up. I went for a long run in the woods and down to the shore.
The house was still and silent. I looked at a collection of small ceramic animals my wife had made, all brilliant glowing red with black spots, set out on a long, low table against a wall in the kitchen.
It was as if the universe held open its arms and gave me my fondest, deepest desires. All that beauty and wildness, all that emptiness and order, all that calm and stillness.
My dream brain’s gift to itself, perhaps.
It was deeply, wonderfully good.
*
In another dream I was on an oceanliner and we were tying anchors to the feet of all these Nazi soldiers and tossing them overboard, alive. Hundreds upon hundreds of them. The hemp lines would unfurl from the deck and whizz down into the dark, frothy sea, and when the slack was out the men would be snatched from the deck and disappear over the side. They never cried out. They just looked at us as they went over.
We were merciless in our work, and it was hard labor, nor was there an end to it.
*
In the next dream a man stood in my front yard, mumbling to me. One of his front teeth was loose and kept jutting out over his lip as he spoke, getting tangled in it. The tooth was small and misshapen and decayed, the color of snot.
I kept wanting to stop him talking and just reach up and yard that tooth out of his head.
*
I am not convinced that my dream life is any less significant than my waking one.
*
One of my deepest pleasures is to get out in the woods and go for long, long walks.
Going there with my grandbaby makes it even better.
I think he likes it, too.
Oh, hell yeah.
*
I got it so damn bad for that kid, I tell you what.
What can you do?
You can’t do nuthin’, is what.
You just gotta love him up.
*
The older I get, the more I like it.
*
Since I was a kid, all I ever wanted to be was married to a woman who loved me that I could share my secrets with, and kiss on and stuff.
Plus be an astronaut or a deep-sea diver.
I got the woman, and I got to be a police. I got love and a scary job and a little bitty old house with a real white picket fence and a dog and a kid and a grandbaby and all manner of terrors and heartbreak and disasters to endure.
I reckon I just about got it all.
*
Love.
High, wide, and handsome.
*
Namaste.
***


Wow. You are on fire!
I am diggin the art and the words.
That baby is yummy!
peace,
pf
He’s superyummy! Glad you’re liking the work.
yrs-
Scott
Oh, lordy. That little baby boy is just perfection. Your cube houses — I feel like I saw them just this month in Sunset Magazine. You should check them out.
The rest? Perfection.
I’ll look for that sunset piece.
Thank you!
yrs-
Scott
Merry.
And jolly.
Those are the two words that appeared in my brain when I laid eyes on that perfect example of happiness incarnate, aka your grand baby.
What a merry little fellow he appears to be.
And what a grand, grand baby.
Yeah, he’s merry and jolly all right.
He’s going to need it, too.
Right now? I’d pay double for what it cost to have him around.
He’s the embodiment of why we want to be alive. You know, there’s all this shit….and then there’s his smile.
it’s not even close.
i’m glad you are happy, Laurel. you really should be.
love-
Scott
You know this whole happiness thing has me feeling a bit like Dorothy.
All along, my whole life, really, I thought happiness was something solid and real, something you sought, something you clicked your heels together 3 times and chanted an incantation to beg/invite into your life.
Dude, the whole damned time it was right here in my backyard?
Inside of me?
Seriously, I’m guessing this fluke event was the result of some major or minor shift in my brain chemicals but I ain’t naming it beyond the H word nor questioning it nor trying to tag it to something nor definite it.
It is what it is.
And brother? It is a thing of pure, unadulterated beauty.
i came back a second time to look at that little guy. i love – BIG LOVE – your blog, scott and i LOVE your art and i LOVE YOU PEOPLE.
but that picture is frosting on a rich and delicious cake – and i’m one of those people who loves the frosting!
His smile just blasts right into my heart. I see that little guy grinning, I don’t feel bad about anything anymore.
Wow. I love those dreams. And that little boy of yours all, is he ever loveable and open and just plain joy all over his face.
Something about having the woods at your back, isn’t there.
Those dreams are still with me. Something deep stirring in there somewhere…
And yes to the boy and yes to the woods.
so, i keep coming back here to drink in the joy and life and that beautiful boy’s face because every time I gaze on him, I feel happy. He is a powerful little soul in a family of powerful souls. He’s knows what he’s doing, and he makes me laugh and clap my hands with him. Lord, he’s sweet.
That picture in particular captures something of his wonderfulness and deep joy in the whole world.
He’s going to make a splash in the world.