*
This is for my wife.
*
But, you know, you can watch it, too.
*
I’ve been watching this show Parenthood with my kid. A freaking marathon of it. Hours and hours and hours and hours. Sitting on the sofa with her, wrapped up in her blanket, the little guy in his donut pillow between us, these people on the television loving and suffering together, working through their family stuff together.
I cry about every seven minutes.
We pass the little guy back and forth.
*
It is like being in a little spaceship, out in the vast emptiness of the spinning void.
My heart is all melty.
*
Anyway, I saw this little video here.
I really like the site.
*
So this guy in the little movie, he’s right up my wife’s alley. The magpie collector, that’s her, too. And how he lives his life, sitting outside his open door, letting everyone in…it’s the opposite of my every inclination.
And watching him, I see how small and fearful I am on the inside.
*
I want to be bigger on the inside.
*
Anyway. I’m sitting here, missing my wife, the baby is gurgling and thrashing and the kid is bouncing him and the people on the television are suffering and loving and failing and I’m going to go back and sit with the kid and watch them go at it.
We don’t have to say anything.
We can just sit there like bumps on a log.
*
Watch the little film.
*
Namaste.
***
Most beeyootiful thing in that home? The man’s face.
he’s a sweetheart, for sure.
He IS beautiful…
he’s one of those amazing people whose spirit shines right through them, out into the world at large.
I think you like him, ’cause you’re like him.
And I think your spirit shines right through you out into the world at large.
It certainly does here.
Well, that is a sweet thing for you to say. Thanks.
That film is so amazing. What an idea to be open to the world. I crave that for myself.
The Surfer and I both watch Parenthood. I think it’s the only television show he watches and he’s the one who told me about it. I love it because of Peter Krause (Adam) who played Nathaniel in Six Feet Under. When I watch Parenthood I say to myself hey! there’s Nate! Hi Nate! Hi!. The thing is I’ve watched Six Feet Under over fifteen times all six seasons of it. I love Parenthood but honestly I mostly watch it to see Nate again and that scary girl Madison Bell from the B horror movie Swim Fan (recommended if you’re 13 like me.)
xo
I know, I know. I’m all about the Nate, too.
It’s like reincarnation.
Same guy, you know? Just a different life, different issues.
I love him. I can’t help it.
ps. I also wanted to say that watching Parenthood makes my throat hurt watching all those families who know how to do it right even when they screw up fathers who love mothers and sisters who don’t die and brothers who struggle and remain friends. It just makes my throat ache and ache.
I swear to god I’m not kidding I cry through the whole damn show. My kid laughs her ass off at me. I come in from the kitchen, wiping my hands on a flour sack towel, sit on the edge of the sofa, look at the tv for a minute, then I have to get up real quick and walk away, wiping my eyes with the damp towel.
I am the worst kind of softie.
Trippy — I just watched “This is My Home” on a link on facebook.
There are those who make accusations that the internet drives us as individuals farther apart, but I beg to differ. Today, in a matter of hours, this film was connected in a line from New Zealand to Seattle to somewhere in California. That is a connection never before possible, in such a short time, pre-internet.
Thank you for making these connections happen, again and again.
We are all part of a single entity, scrabbling out the distances between points, rendering them shorter with every breath.
you are right, these times are new.
i’ve never felt closer to everyone else.
never.
we are all one.
yrs–
scott
I watch the show, too, and think it’s insufferable and perfect all at once. Super cheesy and tear-inducing. They’re really good with the special needs kids stuff — really, really good. And I love Nate/Peter Krause.
The Improvised Life? Oh, my goodness. I’ve been a fan for years — it’s an awesome website, and the author is a cook!
I feel like I’m sitting in your living room right now, nodding my head and passing you the Kleenex, and here, I’ll take the baby for a minute and walk around a bit with him, please?
Oh, and that video? I kept re-playing the times he says the word “beautiful,” because it’s exactly the way my father says it.
Yeah, I’ve thought about you and Sophie while watching Max and his parents trying to deal with their issues.
And you’re right, it is cheesy. Super cheesy. And the sets drive me crazy with their overdone color and chic-but-lived-in perfection.
Still, I love it.
And that guy’s voice, everything he says sounds beyootiful.
yrs-
Scott
i love that you love parenthood. it makes perfect sense somehow. especially now.
i love this post.
and that nate reincarnated comment, perfect! i love him too.
thank, angella.
I love his voice.
And the joy in his eyes.
Man, do I love the joy in that man’s eyes.
Thanks for pointing the way to that site where you found the video.
Needed to read that Beckett quote. Hell, I need to live that Beckett quote.
Love that suspended girl of yours below. Hanging above a field of flowers and butterflies. Lovely. Whether she’s dead or alive or somewhere in between, she’s lovely.
For some reason, she conjures a Kate Bush song for me. Running up that Hill.
Don’t watch Parenthood. But anything that makes you cry is a good thing.
yeah, i love that suspended girl, too. you are right about her.
thanks, as always.
i want to go there.
i, too watch parenthood. i watch it by myself on my computer when i have a free 42 minutes to myself. i have no idea why, but it makes me feel like suitable member of humanity. i always cry and sigh with relief: “look how beautiful the imperfection is.”